Just to write.

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It feels like when some people encounter certain things that are essentially “me,” they feel the need to water me down, dilute me, stretch this piece of me so thin as to be transparent, made invisible, made less. Less powerful, less strong, less able to be and be seen and be important. I find myself in these conversations, with strangers and with lovers, with family and with friends, with colleagues and with collaborators, and always the same – why, why does it have to be, why can’t you be, why don’t you see, what does that even mean?

Where are the people who don’t have to ask?

Who don’t even think to?

And if not the questions, then the statements — oh no, you will. But you should. You’ll see.


Just… stop.

Take your directives off of me. Keep your questions to yourself.

If you really want to know about me, let me fill your senses, and make you uncomfortable, and bring you to a place where you are without words — and just be. Sit with it, with me in all my me-ness. Once you allow this, once you stop taking the goddamn brownies out of the oven every five minutes to see if they’re done yet — you will understand MY words. You will see me, fiercely me, 100% pure me, genuine, natural, not-from-concentrate me — and then you will not have any more questions except, may I, and, would you please. You won’t try to tell me anything about myself, because you realize that you have a lot to learn. And you will want to learn it.

And I will teach you. But, don’t worry about the questions. I promise, I will answer them all in good time.



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